Tag Archives: hipster

Phylogeny Of Fashion Explained

RU a fungi? Hopefully not. Maybz, you’re a pretty plant. U could be an awesome animal or a fascist fashion dinosaur… Lots’a people ask me: “What am I?” The whole point of Natural Selection is for you to decide for … Continue reading

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Why Do Hipsters Stink?

Where do hipsters come from? And, why do they stink? You could say the hipster is just a result of the Internet, and just another piece of history repeating… But who are the true people that did this all before … Continue reading

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Notez From A Psych Wardster Pt. 15

Pre- Hospitalization #1: I never knew the word “hipster” before moving to New York.  It confused the shit out of me.  When I moved to NYC at the ripe age of 18, I had the art kid style: skinny jeans, … Continue reading

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Fast Fashion

Ladies, Germs, and/or Fags… Here’s a poem: Fast Fashion Hipsters are crude; Wearing Ugg boots is rude. In a newster way, Make a straight boy look gay. Glue some shit to your face- In an avantagardster case. Damn, who you … Continue reading

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Fear The Fedora

Fedoras are everywhere. Fedoras are NOT your friend. Fear the fedora. Freddy Krueger made them scary and Indiana Jones made it sexy, but hot blonde tryster-hipsters make them an unfortunate staple in their crappy closets. Ever since the invention of … Continue reading

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Transphylogeny

Here at Natural Selection, we’ve said before: you can move from one subcategory in the phylogeny of fashion to the other.  But, nobody is born a plant or an animal.  You’ve been brought up by the Old Generation as a … Continue reading

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Unibrows Are The New Mustaches

Mustaches are sooo tryster faux-New Generation!  Especially curly-cue mustaches.  What’s the deal with nowies wearing mustaches and making duck faces in poorly edited Facebook pics? What’s the deal with hipsters having curly-cue mustaches for realziez? Mustaches are soo DONE- over … Continue reading

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Plant, Animal, or Fungus?

What is a tryster?  A tryster is a fungus that tries to be hipster-y.  Often, nowies TRY to be hipsters, making them trysters.  Sometimes a plant or fungi poses as an avantgardster to go see a show.  That would make … Continue reading

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Cooltential

New words for the Natural Selection Dicktionary, lil Darwinz… Here’s your new vocab words, take out your No. 2 pencils… cooltential and cooltentious. Cooltential (Cool-ten-shal): A person or thing that has potential to be cool. A person that is cool-ish-ish … Continue reading

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Category: Growin' Natural Selection, Phylogeny of Fashion | Tags: , , ,
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Dicktionary of NatSel

Confused bi the language we here at Natural Selection use?  Why don’t we grab the NatSel Dicktionary and I’ll explain. Here at Natural Selection, we’ve developed our own language and way of describing style.  It’s a New Generation!  Forget about … Continue reading

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#Occupy The Internet

Look at these two hipsters protesting at the #Occupy Wall Street rally.  Do they realize that they’re flagging for oral and anal sex?  Did you know that bandanas mean different things to the gay community? I doubt that these hipsters-wannabe-hiptestors-looking-like-hippiesters … Continue reading

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Plant, Animal, or Fungus?

Hello, Lil’ Darwinz…  Welcome to a fabulous edition of Plant, Animal, or Fungus.  I’m your host, James Dwynn. This is a game where you test your knowledge of the Phylogeny of Fashion. Whenever a plant or animal throws a party, … Continue reading

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